inventories

I'm not happy.  I'm too sensitive for this world.  Yea I'm the greatest writer of all time, but so what?  That's not enough these days; you gotta play the game...and listen to them utter shit as boring as my morning yawn.  I should say, as an evening yawn—the morning one has some character.  This one bloke on fb is stealing my semi-colons, or I'm pretty sure he's trying to incorporate it into his pretentious preachy bullshit.  I mean god bless him, but he's pretty egotistical—he searches for platforms to make grand speeches.  I wish I could make good speeches, it would have come in handy the time I thought all the migrants Downtown were on the bus to hear me confess my sins.  I hate fb.  I see him with an em dash, and I'm calling the authorities.  There should be a "Dislike" button, and a "Blow them Up," which is pretty self-explanatory.  All I'm doing over there is recycling my greatest hits.  I'm a robot.  And I can't stop.  But it makes me appreciate this space more.  I looked up the semi-colon to see if he's just following basic law. He's realized how I revolutionized the status update industry.  He can get more likes.  He's probably reading this right now, the worm.  They're all going to steal my shit. They're going to read it to someone else, take credit for it, and have sex!  That's my sex.  That's why they ignore me.  I hate them.  

My facebook is a beautiful place now, thanks to you guys.  But it's made by a disgruntled asshole.  I love this place.  Here, I'm just gruntled.

UPDATE, Rick Steves reporting: 

 - He was so grumpy, Janet, his evening nap lasted four hours.  You can forget about swimming or jogging for the day—the Y is closed.  That was one too many evening yawns, Janet.  From Harrowdown Hill…………I'm Rick Steves.

- (Janet) This guy's so ann—Oh, thanks, Rick.

- (Ted Cruz) Maybe he needed rest.  Did you discern if he's gyming it out too much?  Rick?  I think we lost him.

- (Janet, aside) Let's not find him again.

- (Rick Steves) Well, Ted, reports indicate, he runs until he's too tired to hate people anymore.

- (Ted Cruz) Thank you, Rick.  That's some diligent reporting. 

- (Rick Steves) I love you, Janet.  I wholly heart you. Is Janet with you, Ted?

- (Ted Cruz) That's inappropriate, Rick.

- (Janet) I'm doing Diego, little man!  Cheesy, prick.

- (Ted Cruz) Oh, our Latin correspondent; let's cool our heels, everyone.