You are the backdrop of my mind.

I don't have the right to request of someone, that they listen to my explanation or reason/excuses for past wrong doing.  And if I apologize, it's not an apology for hurting you, but an apology for the wrongdoing.  I don't have the right to ask any more of said person after the apology.

I'm not sure if I understood all of it, probably not.  My short term is busted like the facial bones of Brutus the Barber Beefcake, back when he and Hulk Hogan were a tag team in the 80's.  It takes a while to leave the house after I'm ready to leave the house these days.

Sometimes when I'm driving I'll think that someone just crashed into me while we were driving, and while I'm debating myself whether someone just crashed into me, the other party has already disappeared from the scene, and I become more focused on convincing myself to be surprised if there is actual damage when I pull over and check the vehicle.  As though blocking the memory of the perpetrator fleeing unaccountable(?), and the resulting psychological and financial ramifications. 

Sometimes I'll think I may have skinned my vehicle while driving.  But the same blocking mechanism applies.

Sometimes I'll be driving and I'll think everything in the bottom of the car just fell out.  It's a fear I've had since childhood.  What are you supposed to do about your legs?